Improvement pill here if you’re someone who cares way too much about what others think of you then this video is for you so pay close attention because I’m gonna show you exactly what you need to do now the reason why we care so much about what others think of us is because we humans are social animals our survival has always been dependent on our ability to work together so whether you like it or not because we are social animals we subconsciously sort the people in our environment into hierarchies.
We rank everyone by their power status and whatever else we value from top to bottom like a pyramid for example if you were working in a corporate setting something like a typical office job you’re gonna have a hierarchy that’s sort of looks like this your boss and his superiors are all the way at the top you’re over here and the interns and people with less important positions are ranked below you the reason we care so much about what others think of us is because we humans are always concerned about where we currently stand in our hierarchy it’s everyone’s unconscious goal to try to secure a position closer to the top.
Because well things are better up there you get more respect you have more power to do things you don’t have to listen to anyone else you make more money people like you more the list goes on and on and on it the point is it’s generally better to be at the top and that’s why we all subconsciously try to get there now if you’re at the middle or at the bottom of your hierarchy then you’re gonna care a lot about what others think of you because you need to be constantly paying attention to their reactions to make sure that you’re saying and doing the right things.
That you’re acting quote/unquote cool enough to gain their respect and climb up the pyramid on the other hand if you’re near or at the top of your hierarchy you’re still gonna care a lot about what others think of you because you need to pay attention to what’s happening in the group making sure that people don’t spread rumors or do things that could hurt your reputation so that you can keep your position at the top so it doesn’t matter where you are in your hierarchy.
Because either way you’re still gonna care a lot about what others think of you it’s just human nature wait so an improvement bill does this mean that no matter what I do there’s no way for me to get out of this trap well not quite see there are a couple of ways you can cheat this but the most practical way in my opinion is what I like to call the butterfly method this is when like a butterfly you fly around from social environment to social environment from group to group doing.
So will mean that you are part of many different hierarchies not just one or two like most people but at least four or more see the more hierarchies that you are a part the less you will care about each one if you’re only a part of one group then a hundred percent of your concerns will be about how high on the hierarchy you are within that one group but if you have two groups that you actively participate in then your concerns become split maybe 50/50 maybe 60/40 or maybe even 70/30 depending on how much time you spend with each group now it doesn’t matter too much because just by having another group of people that you want an active part of how much you care about what others think of you and either group will drop significantly bump.
This to four or five or even six groups and you’ll find yourself at a point where you don’t really care that much about each group yes you’re still gonna care a bit about what others think and that’s perfectly normal it’s a part of being a human being but you’re gonna care much much much less because it doesn’t matter if you’re not in a good position for one group you still have five other groups you’re living off the mindset of abundance which is when you have an excess of something and by simply having an abundance of social groups that you are a part of you’re gonna find yourself acting in a more relaxed and collected manner you’re gonna find yourself treating others in the group.
More confidently and in a more fun and carefree way and because of this you will actually climb many of these hierarchies without even trying okay so how exactly do you do this how does one execute the butterfly method well there are two ways to go about this the first is to start looking for other groups to join in the past I was an avid user of the platform meetup comm there you can find people that share common interests and hang out with them board games public speaking groups sports fanatics you name it they have it by expanding your social circle like this.
You will find yourself a part of many different groups the more groups you actively participate in the less you will care about what others think of you in each one the second way you can take advantage of the butterfly method is by traveling by yourself when you travel to another country all on your own and socialize with the people there you remove yourself from the hierarchies that you are normally a part of you’re in a totally different place with totally different people and oftentimes you’ll start to notice yourself acting very differently more confidently more carefree when you’re abroad.
Because these are all hierarchies that you don’t really care about because the mindset is you’re only there for a couple of days or weeks and you’ll probably never see those people again by traveling so many places on your own you end up joining and leaving dozens of different groups and what you’ll find when you eventually return home is a very different perspective on life you’re going to have an understanding of just how many people there are in the world just how many groups and hierarchies you can join and this is the ultimate form of abundance understanding that.
In a world with seven billion people there are endless groups to join now we all know caring too much about what others think is bad but there are things that you should care about things like learning which brings us to the sponsors of today’s video bling cast blankets is the perfect place for learning they take the key teachings from thousands of books and compress them into 15-minute summaries that you can read or even listen to it’s an app that I’ve been using for quite a while now and it’s helped me out a lot because I’m constantly looking for ways to improve my own life.
So I’m always on the hunt for new information but I simply don’t have the time every single week to read dozens and dozens of books Linkous allows me to quickly learn about new topics and new techniques and try them out go to WWE comm forge slash improvement pill or click on the link in the description box below to get access to their new promotion the first 100 viewers who click on this link will get an extended 1 week free trial one of my favorite summaries on their app that I recommend you to check out is their summary on the laws of human nature which has recently just climbed to the top of my reading list it goes into detail about why we do the things that we do so definitely check it out besides that guys stay tuned [Music]